Silent Rocker
by Melain
Summary: After Mem.Arc: Ryou, devistated after loosing his yami, goes to stay with his cousin in America to try and cope with everything... and ends up slowly discovering who he really is. light BxR, beware the OCs...
1. Prologue

I've been playing with this plot for… almost a year now… One of my friends sent me some character ideas for OC's after I told her of an idea dealing with Ryou and his cousin (my OC). The character's she came up with were basically our small circle of friends only… we're guys instead of girls. It's been really fun to mess around with and I decided to do a full story.

This is the prologue, so it's REALLY short. But my chapters are going to be REALLY long. Personally I don't care if other ppl don't like it. This is just where I'll post the chapters for my friends. But I hope that some ppl here find it amusing and at least a good idea. (Despite how badly it's written).

I'll get the first chapter up in a few days…

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**_Disclaimer:_** Melain doesn't own YGO or any of it's characters, but she does own Ishi!

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_Prologue

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_

Encouragement.

Something no one would have ever though Bakura, the evil spirit of the ring, was capable of giving; and the one thing he was always trying to give me. Though I didn't know why at the time. You see, I'm different than what everyone sees me as; he found that out before I did. And he hated it, that I was always trying to be someone I'm not, and told me that on frequent occasions. It disgusted him that I didn't express myself so I would please people who, and I quote, "don't even see me anyway". Gee thanks yami, now I feel loved.

Sadly he was right, I could walk into school in a dress and most wouldn't notice. Wait scratch that, yes they would. (And I'd get more attention from my 'fanclub' than I already do.) Okay, different example; I would dye my hair black and most wouldn't notice… for a week or two. I mean, Yugi-tachi would just because if I'm normal I'm invisible but if something's out of the ordinary then I'm at the top of their priorities list. But even after everyone else noticed they would forget about it by the next day. Which is a really cool thought for me because I always wanted to dye my hair black. Not only would I look good (and somewhat normal) with it at first, but when I'm growing my silver-white color out again it will look completely awesome! Anyway, I'm going off topic. My interests and hobbies were completely different than what any would have interpreted, because I don't voice them. According to Bakura (who must have spent most of his long hours at my house while I was at school pondering this), if I was to change my appearances and be 'myself', I'd be a total punk rocker.

Yes, I know what you're thinking. So let me explain…

I use to have this little fetish with anything occult, though that expanded a bit when I met Bakura. As I grew older I started becoming more attached to some other things. One being music. I _love _J-Rock, and I like some American and British bands as well. Bakura thinks under influence, I'd probably make a rocker. He also thought it would be good for me, boost my confidence and stuff. I didn't believe him at all; my thought is the same as most of yours. But Bakura had officially declared me a 'silent' punk rocker, and reminded me of that constantly. The weird thing is though, if I had this so called 'influence', he'd probably be right. So basically, if I had the _guts_ to dress and express myself the way that I want to I'd make a rocker. Bust as most can tell, I won't in a million years. I mean, come on, _me_? I wouldn't even admit to myself that I wanted to change my outer image to suit my real personality and by more like… well, me. So Bakura kept literally 'encouraging' me to be who 'I really want to be'.

But that made me think; who did I want to be? Me, of course. But I started to think more and more about what he had told me. And about what really made me happy. I started to realize I really wasn't portraying who I really am. Everyone saw me as either the quiet-smart-British boy, or as just another face in the crowd; the last being the most common. I kind of envied my friends, who always seemed to stand out. They were the kind of people you'd see… anywhere, and go home and tell other people about them or what they did or what they looked like. People other people noticed. I wanted to be noticed, but I also wanted to be stronger. Maybe Bakura was right, maybe an influence was all I needed. And Bakura was determined to be that influence; I never understood why he would even care. He'd go off and say I'm his host or I grew on him or something like that. So I left it at that and let him amuse himself but forming me into the person I was capable of being; and it started to work. Living with him during the summer Yugi-tachi _ditched_ me he taught me a lot of things (the very first few of those things being self-defense and thievery), though I would be lying if I said that I didn't grow over those months. I was growing stronger both mentally and physically and was the closest to being myself that I had ever been. But I still didn't look the part. Bakura had started helping me in that department a little too eagerly, and in some aspects before I had even agreed to this transformation; he filled our closet with faded and tight jeans, which we wore all throughout the Battle City Tournament. Then during that summer, he got us this AWESOME black trench coat! I could have kissed him.

I had no clue how involved Bakura was getting in making me be who I wanted to be; he once told me that for some reason he didn't like seeing 'all this potential be hidden behind the fake smiles and polite manners', I never got to ask him what potential he was talking about. But he always dropped the subject quickly. After a year or so of this he wanted to widen my range of influence through my cousin who lived in America, and scheduled for us to visit him over the summer. He even went as far as to apply me for a job at a store in their local mall. (How he did that from Japan, I'll never know). But it was a PUNK store! When I checked it out on line, my jaw dropped, (this was at the time I hadn't agreed to go through with the changes… but he knew me too well). Anyway, the store is called Hot Topic, ever heard of it? Yeah, now I couldn't wait for summer.

But then, that spring, Bakura decided he'd had enough playing cat and mouse with the pharaoh. And he started the ultimate shadow game, the Memory World. I had seen it, and tried to change his mind from actually acting out his plan; because it could have worked. But… he lost. I couldn't bear it; I pleaded to whatever God that might be listening that he just passed on to the after life like the pharaoh did, and his soul wasn't destroyed by the shadows. I know he had evil intentions, and I know he was dangerous; but no one deserves to have their soul obliterated. Even Bakura had his good side, I had learned that during the little time I spent with him; sadly, I think I'm the only one that ever saw it.

He was the only one who had ever really been there for me, the only person who had actually given a crap about me. He worked so hard to help me discover myself, and that meant more to me than he could ever imagine. If it weren't for him, I'd probably wouldn't have changed so much over these past few years. No one notices that I've changed, but Bakura did. That meant a lot too… he noticed me. Back when I first came to Japan, I was a mouse. Literally; I never spoke up for myself, barley voiced my opinions, and kept my past and my burdens to myself and pretended everything was fine. I know better now, I'd become stronger than I had ever hoped to be. I'm strong enough to pull through my last year of high school; even if I have to do it alone.

But… I just miss him so much. No one had ever stayed with me for that long, even if at first we weren't exactly on good terms. We grew to accept each other; and he was the other half of my soul. I never expected it would hurt this much, I feel like I'm living with only half a soul. He was a big part of my life, and I was closer to him than I had ever been to anyone. He was the only person who could always tell when something was wrong, and always know how to make me feel better. And vice versa; I was actually some help to him, because I always seemed to know what to do when he was upset. We healed each other, and were bonded through more than just magic. I loved him; I still don't know if it was brotherly or something more… one day I'll find out. But I have no one to talk to about him, because everyone else just thought he was an evil, psychotic, bastard. Which he was, but that didn't stop me from getting so attached to him. He took care of me… and I wasn't alone anymore.

Now I am, I live in an empty house day to day; any empty house that holds so many memories. I gave him his own room you know; my dad was never home, so I gave Bakura the guest room. It's still full of all his belongings, I just can't move anything. It's probably just some false hope that I grasp onto that he'll show up and if I had moved anything he'll get mad at me for touching his stuff. But I can't put away his things. I may be stronger physically, and in some cases mentally. But it's the things like this, that I have already gone through so many times, that tears my heart to pieces. I needed to get out of that house, before the depression was too much to bare. So I asked my cousin if I could come over early. It would help, I know.

My cousin, Ishi (his real name is Jason, Jason Bakura; but we call him Ishi… I don't even remember why anymore). He knew Bakura a little; he came and visited me for a week, and they were plotting against me the entire time. But he's helped me through similar situations before, when my mother and sister passed… he could help me get through this. And I would have work to keep me occupied during the day when Ishi was at school; then their summer was coming around so I would have him to keep me busy all day long. We have just taken our 1st trimester exams, so I could spend the next trimester in America, and come back at the end of the summer for the exams at school. I'd just do all my school studies in America and everything would work out fine.

Then, when I go back to Japan, everything will be better. I will take care of Bakura's room and everything will turn out all right. I'll move on. But there is one thing that I still have to do, I still have to change myself. Be myself. So not change myself exactly, but change my appearance. Reflect who I really am. Bakura wanted me to be myself, he worked so hard for me to find who I am, so by God I'm going to finish what he started.

The day before I got on the plane, I dyed my hair black.

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Yeah, kinda boring. The first chapter is about 15 pages long so get ready for it. I hope you all are liking it so far.

Flames are burned in my fireplace, I'm currently snowed in!

**PLEASE REVIEW!!!!!!

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**

_- Melain_


	2. Chapter 1

Heavily delayed.

Very sorry.

Hope it doesn't suck too much.

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**_Warning:_** it is rated T, because I like to say fuck. And it is used in the story a bit. And my life is put in the story, a lot of inside jokes I might have to explain later. But first one is the Hot Topic near me has a CD rack that is never in order and I get pissed off because I can never find my Dir En Grey CDs!

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**_Disclaimers:_** Oh boy, here we go. Not only do I not own Yugioh, or Ryou, or Bakura. I also don't own Hot Topic, which is mentioned several times in this chapter and throughout this story. I also don't own the Great Mall of the Great Plains, which actually is located in Olathe, Kansas. Let's see; I don't own Panda Express, or whatever the bookstore inside the Great Mall is called. Oh, and I also don't own Grand Theft Auto (which is the game they are playing towards the end, I don't think I mention that in the story). Umm… :skims chapter:, I don't own that T-shirt Ryou's wearing (© Hot Topic), and I don't own Slipknot or HIM… I think that's all. Oh! I don't American-Eagle! And Ishi, Skyler, and Kyle are my characters. Matt, Sean, and Larry are based off my friends. And…yeah, that's all. (is this the longest fucking disclaimer you have ever read?)

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_Chapter 1

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_

He tugged nervously at the studded leather band around his wrist; cautiously looking up from behind the register counter in the middle of Hot Topic. The majority of the store was in black, though red and white also adorned quite a few items extensively, with silver metal studs and spikes gleaming at him from all angles. He didn't quite stand out as much as he would normally have in the setting; dark colored jeans with slight tears around the knees and hems, a black shirt that had a no smoking sign on it reading 'there are cooler ways to die', the studded leather bracelet, and a silver chained necklace with an Indian pendent at the end. His now raven colored locks cascaded over his shoulders and framed his face, contrasting with his pale skin greatly and slightly darkening the color of his mocha eyes. The clothing and jewelry belonged to Ishi, who had suggested he wear something other than the clothes he brought with him. Ryou feared he'd have a new wardrobe by the end of the week.

Heavy metal blasted from speakers above him; though a little awkward for him at first, the music now somewhat soothed his nerves. The assistant manager of the mall had shown him around the store since his manager had classes that morning; to say she was surprised at the shy teen's meekness and polite manner would be an understatement. I guess that meant he was nothing like the people that worked there. Ryou had wondered slightly what his yami had gotten him into. Though there he stood, having finished restocking half an hour ago, waiting for his manager to come and give him further instruction. Business had been expectantly slow; it was the middle of the day on a Monday, only one or two people had strolled through, and only one bought anything.

Ryou had spent some time himself looking through the store's contents, finding most of it very appealing to his taste. He spent quite some time browsing through the chains and other jewelry, as well as the slogan shirts; making note of a few he might want to get with his new employee discount. The CD collection along an aisle facing the register had a rather disorderly arrangement that only took him about 10 minutes to fix. He shifted through those as well, finding a few interesting ones and listening to bits of the songs through the speakers (nervous as hell that his manager would come in and get mad at him for messing with the music). He finally just left the playlist alone, listening to the songs that echoed from over head, not knowing most of them.

It was quite odd to him that he was being left alone on his first day at the shop, and that no one else was there. He pondered that question along with other random topics, to cure his boredom, until a man dressed in all black came through the door; walking swiftly past him and through the back doors without giving him a glance. Not knowing what had happened until the man disappeared Ryou left the counter and was about to enter the back room before a hoarse voice screeched "STAY THERE AND WATCH THE FUCKING STORE!" Ryou winced, resisting the urge to cover his ears. Cautiously he backed up, and waited patiently once more behind the counter; after a few moments cursing himself for being so meek. He slumped into his chair, resting his worn-out sneakers on top of the counter; basically pouting while glowering at the hole in his jeans. Even though he had changed much in the past few years; why was it that everyone could still push him around? As if to emphasize the thought he found his feet pushed off the counter edge causing them to painfully crash on top of some plastic crates in the little cubicle. "No feet on the counters."

His yip of pain not even heard over the music, he merely attempted a glare at the man; though he had to look up further to do so. A smirk crossed the tall man's features, a lip ring gleaming under the head lights as he did so. Hazel eyes inspected the store lazily from beneath black and blonde bangs, his hair messily spiked and cut to accent the style. His ears were heavily pierced and a tattoo could be seen peeking out from underneath a black tank top that had defiantly seen better days. "I'm going to hope you're the new kid."

"Yes," Ryou said, speaking up and trying to strengthen his normally soft voice. He stood up though that did nothing to help him; he was almost 10 inches shorter than the man. "And you're the manager, right?"

"Skyler," he said casually, before promptly leaning over the counter and Ryou to mess with the playlist. Actually he more or less was on top of Ryou, one arm reaching for the computer mouse while the other was propped to support himself and keep Ryou locked in place. Freezing up, Ryou didn't move as Skyler chose another playlist and a more upbeat song sounded from above. Leaning back he hopped on the counter and idly spared a glance back at Ryou, who still hadn't moved and had a faint red tint to his cheeks. He chuckled lightly, snapping Ryou out of his daze and spreading a scowl across his lips. Unconsciously grabbing a pack of cigarettes from his pocket he tapped one out and held it loosely between his lips; knowing full well he couldn't smoke inside the mall, but he wasn't smoking it now was he? "How do you pronounce your name, kid? I couldn't tell from the application." he muttered, cigarette still between his lips as he pulled out a lighter and fiddled with it carelessly. It was torture to not be able to light it, but it comforted him at the same time.

The British teen blinked, trying to register the question while his gaze focused on the lighter. It was shaped like a coffin, red trimmed with a gothic-style cross on the front; Skyler casually flicked it to life, the flame lasting a few seconds before he shut the cap and repeated the process in a continuous manner. "Ano… Ryou. Ryou Bakura."

"'Bakura'?" Skyler asked, his accent distorting the 'a's. He flicked open the lighter again, the flame glowing a few seconds before disappearing under the cap once more. "You know Ishi then?"

"Yeah…" Ryou answered, leaning against the counter again. "He's my cousin." He spun a lock of ebony hair around his finger, still not quite use to the change. His hair felt if possible heavier with the darker color dyed into it. His aunt had freaked when she saw 'what he did to it', she wasn't happy but both knew that Ishi was going to love it. Ryou had yet to see his cousin, arriving at the house after he had left for school. Though Ishi being Ishi demanded (through many post-it-notes) that he change what he was wearing before going to work; fully confident that it wouldn't suit the setting. Though with his hair he could have probably pulled it off. Ryou also noted that he could no longer poke fun at Duke for always playing with his hair; it was extremely amusing. Skyler laughed a little at the teen's answer to his question.

"I don't know if I should pity or envy you." Then it was Ryou's turn to laugh.

"Ishi can be a handful," he said light-heartedly. "But he makes life fun, that's for sure." Skyler nodded, a smile now on his lips and the cigarette between his fingers in a skilled method, tipping off imaginary ashes.

"I guess that means he'll be around here more than usual then?" This time he looked back at the black haired teen; and Ryou saw his hazel eyes laughing warmly. A small smile escaped him as well, brown eyes sparkling from beneath dark bangs. Maybe it was the best choice to get away from Domino; meeting new people and interacting with the world seemed to be doing him more good than harm.

"That's my guess, though I don't know what he does after school," Ryou answered.

"I think that might be a good thing, knowing Ishi," Skyler added in a perceptive tone, leaning back on his hands and gazing up at the rafters tiredly. Ryou nodded; a wave of fatigue washing over him unexpectedly, causing a weary moan to emit from his lips. "The thought make you that tired?"

Ryou shook his head. "Jetlag." He had just got there this morning. A faint understanding 'ah' was heard before Skyler jumped off the counter and strode back towards the back room. Ryou watched him disappear, the bass and drums crashing from the speakers suddenly seeming louder. He crossed his arms on the counter and rested his head against them, not wanting to think what time it was back home. Home. No, he didn't want to think about home. This _was_ his home for the next few months; he'd get use to it and eventually welcome the change. This might be his new home altogether, seeing as how his house back in Domino didn't seem like home anymore. Would it when he returned? He didn't think so… but a lot could happen in 3 months.

"Hey!" Skyler's voice shattered his train of thought. He returned into the shop, black boots announcing his entry before Ryou even looked up at him. "Did you stock the shelves?" Ryou nodded. "Correctly." Ryou blinked tiredly for a moment.

"I believe so," he said slowly. Standing up fully and trying to rub the tiredness from his eyes. "Was I not suppose to?"

"No, you were," Skyler ran a hand through his hair, the spikes falling back into place afterwards. "I guess Amanda showed you where everything was."

"Who's Amanda?" Ryou asked. Was that the assistant manager that showed him here?

Skyler looked at him confusedly. "Black hair, too many piercing, about this tall," he held his hand level at his chest. When Ryou just shook his head, his hazel eyes turned silver as they narrowed dangerously. "THAT BITCH!" And he stormed back out of the shop again. Ryou stared frightened a moment or two, but when all was silent except for the sounds that came from the speakers he calmed down. And that's when the shouting began. "DAMNIT SIMPSON! THIS IS THE FORTH TIME THIS MONTH YOU'VE SKIPPED SHIFT!" And so on and so forth, with many cursings and threats between. When it hadn't let up after ten minutes Ryou turned his attention back to the store, awaiting for the phone call to end. Though it didn't seem like it was going to anytime soon. He groaned and rested his head against the counter once more. This was going to be a long day.

--

Ryou sighed as another customer walked out through the large metal arches at the entrance of the store, trademark black plastic back in hand. About two in the afternoon people had started walking in and there had been a steady flow of them for the past hour. Skyler had ditched him about half an hour ago saying something about getting coffee next door and had yet to return, leaving Ryou to handle the store himself. His new boss was either a good judge of character or way too blithe. He was hoping for the first one, but then realized there was no chance of that; Skyler had left the store in the same black tank top, long skull-print pajama bottoms, and fuzzy black slippers.

Fatigue was beating him other the head with the time change, which Ryou was too tired to figure out. He slumped back in his chair and blocked out the over-head lights with one hand, letting the ever-continuous flow of hard rock pound through his head. Luckily for him a wave of employees should be arriving after school hours, which had started about five minutes ago.

A good twenty minutes stretched by lazily without anything happening, causing Ryou to become even more drowsy; and nearly fell asleep sitting there. He sat back up, shaking his head a little and looked at the clock, trying to figure the time change just to keep himself amused, until another customer came through the large metal arch.

A teenage boy walked in with an exasperated look on his face, seeming to be taking sanctuary inside the store. He gave a slight glance at Ryou behind the register, giving a short "hey" as a passing greeting. Ryou offered a "Hello" in return, watching as the boy's eyes immediately went to the CD rack before he started glancing around the store. His hair brushed his shoulders and was a light brown with obvious blonde and red highlights, a little disheveled from the collar of his jacket. A jean jacket with a few tears on the arms and flecks of worn-in paint along the tattered cuffs. He wore a darker color jeans with the hems torn apart around his feet, and a red logo shirt that Ryou couldn't read. The boy shook his head as he reached the last corner of the store and retreated to the CD rack, obviously not finding what he wanted.

"Can I help you find anything?" Ryou asked politely, suddenly remembering that he worked there. The Jetlag was really starting to get to him.

"Yeah, I'm looking for someone- ohmygod its in order," he said in surprise.

"What is?"

"The CD's, they're in order!" He said excitedly. "Every time I can actually come here I can never find anything and now it's organized," he automatically started flipping through a certain section then visibly faltered. "And I still can't find my CD. You know, I should have guessed." He stepped away and looked back over to the raven haired teen. "Anyway I'm looking for someone who works here."

"Well I'm the only one working at the moment, and Skyler is supposedly next door," He muttered the last part with a little annoyance.

"Yeah, I saw him." The boy answered. "I'm looking for someone that just started here, his name is Ryou?"

Ryou blinked slowly, trying to register what was said; the boy's accent had distorted his name a little. "Um… I'm Ryou." He said while giving the boy an odd look, and he only received on in return.

"You're hair is black."

"Yeah, I dyed it. Ano…. if you don't mind me asking; who are you?"

"Huh? OH! I'm sorry, that probably creeped ya out. My name is Kyle, I'm a friend of Ishi's." He held out a hand to the raven-haired boy, who took it after letting out a light sigh.

"It's a pleasure to meet you… you obviously know my name," he added with a slight blush.

"Yeah, Ish' talks about you a lot. Especially these past few days," he said with a laugh, before turning his green-gray eyes towards the large store windows. "I wonder what's taking him so long, he was right behind me."

"Is he next door with Skyler?"

"Probably was, but not anymore." Ryou followed Kyle's gaze to the store windows where Ishi was jumping forward foot by foot, wailing his arms as he did so. Ryou slid a tired hand down his face; reminding himself of how Ishi usually was. His cousin was almost a year older than him and a few inches taller; they use to look like complete polar opposites except similar family features. Ishi had stuck with the same hair style for the past two years and for good reason. It was cut semi-short and styled to accent the genetic Bakura spiked hair; it was blue-black (which also ran in the family) with some hint of red and a big red streak died across one part of his bangs. It suited him and looked awesome. A blur of color was a perfect way to describe him; bright emerald green eyes standing out behind the black bangs and a light tan from the hints of summer outside.

He entered the store still hoping with his feet together and a voice behind Ryou said, "By the way, he tied his own shoes together." The British teen actually did smack his hand to his forehead that time.

"Yep, that's Ishi." Ryou answered, as his cousin spotted him and a stunningly bright smile spread across his face. Ishi could brighten a room no matter what, and Ryou couldn't help the grin that escaped his lips as well. Ishi started hopping over and Ryou could hear him faintly over the music saying 'Ryou' with every jump, arms still wailing in circles to keep balance. As he neared him though, he showed no sign of slowing to a stop.

"Ryou!Ryou!Ryou!Ryou!" He said excitedly with each hop and Ryou took a step back worriedly but couldn't escape as he cousin took one last hop and glomped him, sending them both to the floor. His laughter made the smile brake out across Ryou's face as he started to giggle as well.

"_Ishi!_" He exclaimed in protest, caught in the other's grasp as his cousin snuggled him to death.

"OhmygodohmygodohmygodIcantbelivehowlongitsbeencauseImissedyousososoSOOOOOOOOOOMUCH!!!!" he yelled loud enough for people outside the store to hear him and also making Ryou laugh again.

"I missed you too." He hugged him back, though Ishi took advantage and got a better hold on him around the waist and kept him pinned to the floor, nuzzling and snuggling and cuddling him till Ryou was over come with laughter and any sadness or fatigue was forgotten. "Ishi let me up!" he cried out through his fits of giggles.

"No, I like you right here. And this floor is comfy," he whined.

"Ish' the floor is really gross let me up!" Ryou said finally controlling his laughter, though that made Kyle's more noticeable. An inevitable grin was hidden behind his hand as he witnessed the long due reunion and a look in his eyes that screamed 'that is so fricken' cute!'.

"Let him up Ishi, you don't know what or who else has been on this floor." Ishi pouted for a moment but loosened his grip and allowed Ryou to stand up, then quickly undid his shoe-laces so he could walk. Though not bothering to tie them back up he then once again captured Ryou around the waist from behind and refused to let go.

"There you're standing up, doesn't mean I still can't _squish you to death!_" He emphasized by tightening his grip and crushing his cousin to his chest, Ryou shrieking in laughter as Ishi started nuzzling him again. A slight blush had stained his cheeks by this time; Ryou had forgotten how 'touchy' his cousin could be. When they were younger he would never leave poor Ryou alone, though Ryou hadn't minded too much at the time. But one reunion he had said he was afraid one day Ishi would squish him like a bug; everyone had laughed at that and his cousin had teased him with that phrase ever sense.

"God, you are so mean to me!" Ryou nearly-whined, trying to pry his cousin's iron grip around his waist. An obvious failed attempt.

"Ishi stop molesting my employees!" Skyler had returned, cup of coffee in hand.

"Aww… whyyyy," Ishi whined, Ryou's smile hadn't faded at all, but brightened a little and a giggle escaped him at his cousin's childish behavior. Ishi's age of majority had stopped at about seven and had been stuck there for a many number of years. No one wanted or expected him to change for quite a while longer.

"Because he's suppose to be working."

"But he's so CUTE!" He exclaimed and snuggled into Ryou's cheek, making the boy laugh again. "I just can't HELP IT! He is mine and I'm never letting him go, you can't have him!" He stated, turning Ryou away so Ishi was between him and Skyler and throwing the college student a mock-glare. Only causing the man to raise an eyebrow underneath his black and blonde bangs before sitting back up on the counter in the middle of the store.

"Unfortunately Ishi, his contract says you have to share him during working hours," Skyler informed him, only making Ishi whine cutely again. Though soon he grew bored of that and went back to nuzzling and keeping Ryou from his work. "Where's everyone else?" Skyler directed to Kyle, who looked surprised at suddenly being thrown into a conversation.

"Um… Larry's on his way, and I don't think I want to know where Matt and Sean are." A look crossed Skyler's face before he smirked broadly causing Kyle to glower at him. "Yeah, thanks. I really don't want to know." The two cousins had been listening in and Ishi suddenly perked up.

"Oh! I'll go get them!" and was then making his way out of the store, taking a confused Ryou with him.

"_No_ Ishi!"

"Don't take him _with _you!"

--

"Twenty minutes, new record. Quickie much?"

"Fuck you, Kyle." growled the taller of the two teens as they walked through the store's entrance; though their disheveled appearances didn't counteract the suggestion the brunette had made… and neither did the smirk on his face or the blush on the other's.

Ryou, who had only just escaped his cousin ten minutes ago, once again abandoned his work and looked to the two new faces. The taller teen's hair is what caught his eye first, black with almost blood red tips, about as long as Skyler's with coarse black locks barley covering his ears; he had hazel eyes with a mischievous glint that matched the smirk spread across his lips. Wearing black jeans and a HIM hoody, he stood next to a dirty blonde with his arm draped possessively around the other's waist. Only a few inches shorter than the other, forest green eyes glared half-heartedly at the other behind a curtain of brown-blonde hair. In the light Ryou couldn't figure out what color it really was. His hair wasn't as long as Kyle's but not as short as Skyler's or the teen standing next to him; but was a little tousled, and the teen kept trying to straighten it again. He wore loose red and black pants adorned in chains that hung lightly on his hips and a black shirt with a boldly colored 'Slipknot' logo on it.

"Hey Ryou, come over here!" Kyle tugged the ebony-haired Brit over to the two who were both glaring at Skyler (who was still laughing at them under his breath). "Ryou, this is Matt," he pointed to the black-haired teen, who nodded to him, "and his boyfriend, Sean." The other blushed at Kyle's comment and smiled shyly at Ryou. "This is Ishi's cousin, Ryou-"

"Isn't he cute!" Ishi exclaimed, once again hugging Ryou from behind. It was a miracle in itself that Ishi had been quiet for as long as he had. Even though he had tensed up from habit, the British teen once again had a smile spread across his face; though he was slightly embarrassed at his cousin's statement. And it showed; not aware of the light blush on his cheeks he giggled as Ishi started to nuzzle him again and tried to offer a "Hello" to them though it was a little hard between his laughter.

Sean had his hand covering his mouth in an attempt to keep a squeal back, though Matt let out a laugh at the cousins and his smirk changed to a smile. Sean lowered his hand, grinning cutely, "He's adorable Ish'." The smile lit up his face; and for some reason his straight white teeth stood out, but in a very handsome way.

Ryou didn't think he'd been complimented this much in one place during the entire time he had lived in Japan; causing his blush to deepen.

"Adorable? He's hott, that's what he is." Ryou's blush turned to a deep red but went unnoticed as Sean promptly smacked Matt upside the head. Hard. "OW! FUCK! What was that for!?!" Matt recoiled, clutching his head. Sean sent him a glare, arms crossed with a look that plainly read 'you know what that was for'. "It was a compliment!" He exclaimed. "And you, shut up!" he shouted at Skyler, who was now laughing uncontrollably at the group.

The scene made Ryou remember something from the summer before. Bakura had been trying to break his habit of being polite to everyone, even complete assholes who didn't deserve it. Lesson 1: stop apologizing for everything. Just to test him on this, he would act like a complete ass and if Ryou apologized for anything he would outright smack him upside the head. Not as hard as Sean had hit Matt; but it reminded him of it. "If you apologize to a real bastard, like me," he said that part with such pride Ryou had to bit his lip to keep from laughing at him, "then I will know. And I will smack you. If the asshole doesn't deserve it then you just don't give him your apologies, and certainly never your forgiveness. People will walk all over you if you do that." His trademark smirk spread across his lips handsomely, and he ruffled the other's hair affectionately. "You would make a pretty little doormat though," he had taunted lightly. Ryou had tried to scowl at him, pushing his hand off his head; but failed and only succeeded in smiling at him, giggles escaping from his lips.

It was this memory that stopped him from apologizing for getting Matt in trouble; and Ishi noticed the change.

"Hey," he said softly while the other's were either laughing (or arguing in Sean and Matt's case). "You okay?" he kept his voice low enough so everyone else wouldn't hear him. Ryou's eyes had been glazed over in reminiscence, and slightly sad as well. Doe brown eyes blinked over at his cousin, and smiled softly at him.

"I'm fine," if there was one thing he was good at, it was convincing the world he had no burdens he couldn't bear himself. Unfortunately, Ishi was one of the few people immune to such talent. Not being able to ignore the look Ishi was giving him, and it wasn't an exasperated look either, more of a cross between the puppy-dog-eyes and 'you're hiding something from me, meanie, I'm so hurt Ryou' look; he smiled a little, really smiled, at the look and almost laughed. "I'll tell you later okay."

"Promise?" Ishi would always be a little kid, always have that trust in his eyes. And it was comforting to Ryou; that something that makes him happy, something he loved, will never change. The smile never left his face.

"Yeah, I promise." Ishi smiled at him, that heart-warming smile; and kissed him on the cheek, forcing the giggles to escape from Ryou's throat.

"All right, all right, that's enough," Kyle's words broke through their moment. Sean and Matt had obviously stopped fighting and… well it had started out as a make up kiss.

"You're scaring off my customers," Skyler said amused, though his comment only urged Matt to kiss Sean even deeper. A small sound in the back of the other's throat emphasizing the action. "And scarring Ryou for life." Ryou sent Skyler a half-glare (he wasn't quite good at that yet, the blush didn't help much either), but Sean broke the kiss anyway. Matt whined for a bit, though ended up settling with his arms around his boyfriend's waist; resting his chin on the other's shoulder, placing kisses on his neck whenever he felt it was convenient.

"When's Larry suppose to be here?" Sean asked, nudging Matt's head away from his neck, though the arms around his waist kept him from succeeding.

"I don't know," Kyle shrugged. "Hopefully soon-"

"WHEEE!"

Thump.

"…hi Larry." Kyle tried to keep his balance, another black-haired teen having glomped him from behind and had his arms still secured around his neck. Kyle hugged him back once the new teen had let go of his neck. "It's about time you got here!"

"Why, worried about me?" Larry asked, half smile half smirk on his lips. Dark brown eyes shined and complimented lightly tanned skin; his dark hair a little shorter than Kyle's, and had red tints blended in brilliantly. He wore very worn-in jeans and a faded American-Eagle T-shirt; as well as black ropers cowboy boots peeking out from underneath his jeans.

"Oh yes, so worried. What would we do without you?" Kyle answered, though sarcastic it was still light-hearted. "Are you going to stay or do you have to leave?" He asked, noticing the other's outfit.

"Nope, I'm staying. Just decided to be weird today," he spoke quickly and happily, looking as if he was stopping himself from bouncing up and down. Kyle chuckled a bit.

"Ishi, you want to do introduction's this time?" he offered. Ishi, who had been looking through the jar of buttons on the counter turned to them and nodded enthusiastically.

"Yep! This is my cuz, Ryou!" He said happily; this time Ryou was ready for the glomp from behind. "Ry, this is Lee."

"Call me Larry!" said teen extended his hand to the other, who took it politely.

"It's nice to meet you." His accomplishment for the day, forming an actual greeting through his jetlag. Though the reaction was pretty much the same, his British accent as clear as it was the day he left England.

"Ohmigod Ishi he's so cute!" The blood rushed to his face again, tinting it pink once more. Ryou was sure Ishi was beaming; and sense introductions were done and everyone was there, his attention span was about to kick in any moment…

Larry's beat him to it. "So, _are _we going to walk the mall or just stay in here?" he asked. Kyle shrugged.

"I dunno. Is Ryou still working?"

"Yes," came Skyler's reply. "Though he hasn't been doing much working," a playful glare was sent in Ishi's direction, who's only reply to the tall manager was a blown raspberry.

"Aww… let him off early Sky'," Matt entered the conversation, whining at the college student from Sean's shoulder. "You can watch the store yourself."

"Nah, too lazy."

"Come on, please!" A variety of other protests were sent his direction as well.

"He can leave as soon as someone else shows up." Skyler informed them. There were various groans from the group, and an extremely loud one from Ishi especially, but they all agreed. So Ryou continued with his work around the store, while the others browsed, or picked on him just to see him blush. But as soon as a girl came in, found Skyler, and got behind the counter; the others were dragging Ryou out of the store while Skyler smirked at the poor Brit.

The five proceeded to drag Ryou to every corner of the mall. Fortunately it was a small town mall, and not nearly as crowded as other malls; but still enough to satisfy any random people-watcher. The ceilings and carpet changed with each hall and corner corridor (each holding an entrance to the mall) but the overall theme seemed to be a modern abstract of nature. Various tree…bench…things… proved this theory. But it was really quiet pleasant; everybody had their own space and no one really bothered anyone else. Except for the occasional mall cop.

Hot Topic resided right outside of the theater corridor. Grayish-purples were the main color scheme; some massage chairs strategically placed, and other shops littering the outside part of the theater (along with one wall dedicated to movie posters. Cheesy pop music that everyone knew sounded form overhead, though vary faintly to the point where if you weren't paying attention to it you wouldn't even notice it. The high ceilings were metal and raftered with different blocks of color; as if the painters had suddenly run out of paint and decided, what the hell let's use this color next.

Ryou was taken through one of the two hallways leading off of the corridor and past some shops he could barley catch the name of. Small booths selling jewelry and diet pills and other stuff were set in the middle of the large walkways, and some signs put out by stores were bolted into the ground right outside the store and were very… in the way. Matt in particular would keep a wide distance from them, mumbling some obscene things under his breath with Sean giggling at him. Ryou couldn't help the smile that broke free as Ishi told him, none too quietly, that Matt had a tendency to run into them; meanwhile Matt was yelling, also none to quietly, at Ishi to go fuck himself.

"Wait; so you're from England but you came here from Japan? How does that work exactly?" Kyle asked as the group neared the end of the first hallway. Ryou didn't even get to answer before Matt interrupted.

"You've been to Japan? Oh my God, we should send him into the bookstore!" he smirked, and Kyle burst out laughing after a second, as did the others.

"We always go into the bookstore and go ask the people at the counter if they have any manga," Larry explained.

"They are the ONLY bookstore that hasn't gotten any in stock yet!" Ishi emphasized.

"But we have to go individually," Kyle added. "Otherwise they catch on and get mad at us. But they haven't seen you before so you HAVE to go in and ask!" Before Ryou could respond he found himself being pushed towards the open doors. Though he started to protest, Matt and Kyle insisted it wasn't a big deal and that he should do it.

"It's like tradition! Just go in, and when they say no walk out," Matt told him. "One day we will eventually convince them to sell manga." And Ryou found himself alone in the silence of the lit up bookstore. It was probably brighter in here than it was out in the halls. Though he did go up and ask, he had forgotten it by the time he walked out when he found Ishi whining about food.

"We're in the food court so let's just feed him now," Kyle insisted. Ishi was soon dragging them over to a booth near the Panda Express. "Ishi will eat enough for all of us, is anyone else hungry?" Various 'no's and 'not really's responded to the brunette's question.

"Just let us all split some pseudo-beef and plastic broccoli," Matt told him; Ryou wrinkled his nose at the terms, his appetite suddenly gone.

Even though it had tasted pretty good, the textures were just as Matt had described them.

--

They had been walking the mall for about two hours and were ready to head home soon. Relief was an understatement on Ryou's part, now extremely tired; but he liked hanging with Ishi and his friends. They were really a lot different than Yugi-tachi, and he liked the change. They talked about normal and extremely insane things completely in sync with each other, unlike the constant talking about games and school that centered in the conversations his 'friends' back in Japan held. It was also a wonderful comfort for him to be speaking English fluently again; he could really speak his mind over here, seeing as he didn't have to translate what he was thinking.

His jetlag was really apparent now and Ryou felt as if he was going to collapse. Ishi wanted to go into one last store, Kyle and Larry seemed to be wanting to go in too, but Matt protested and Sean looked as tired as Ryou felt. The three sat outside on one of the circular benches while the others went inside, promising they wouldn't be long. The raven-haired teen almost collapsed onto the bench, his fatigue giving him a rude reminder that it was still there.

Matt was resting against the tree-thing, with Sean cured up to him. Literally curled up; the thin teen had his head resting on the others lower chest and his legs curled up on the seat, trying to get as close to his boyfriend as he possibly could… to his modesty's extent that is. Matt's gaze would land on Sean often, though he would try to look away; and was completely unaware that Ryou was still there and that he had been watching the two. "You tired, baby?" Matt asked and Sean merely nodded against him in response. The elder of the two smirked lightly and gently stroked the other's shoulder before looking up again into the store their other friends had been in.

Ryou zoned out for a bit, finding himself lying down on the bench (as difficult as that may have seemed). He was so tired; and over the past few hours he had smiled and laughed more than he had in the past few months. He was no longer tired because his soul was tired, he was _physically_ tired. This town, these people, this closed off life where he had required himself to be completely open… and he had been trying hard to do so all day; it seemed to be helping him. As he lay there, spacing out, he wasn't thinking of Bakura or death or his empty house back in Domino; he wasn't thinking of… anything. And it was relaxing.

Suddenly a hand was shaking his shoulder, and a voice he didn't recognize was rousing him from the light doze he had been in. "Sorry son, but you can't sleep here; you have to sit up." A blindingly white mall-cop uniform came into his line of vision; he rubbed his eyes and nodded, sitting up. "Try not to fall asleep again, okay?" Nodding again, he tried to blink the fatigue from his eyes as the mall cop continued his rounds.

"I tried to warn you, but I didn't know you were asleep," Matt's voice came from beside him. He looked over, still half asleep, to see Sean getting back into a laying position half on top of Matt after the mall-cop had turned to corner. "Com'ere." It took a moment to register what Matt had said, though Matt waited patiently, and only added to his request when the teen looked confused. "Come here, I won't bite." Getting the jest of it, Ryou scooted over a little and laid down again, his head resting on Matt's thigh. Normally he would have blushed and declined… but he was now too tired too care. Closing his eyes, he was faintly aware of someone running their finger's through his hair; though from where he was laying, he wasn't sure if it was Matt or Sean…

--

No less more than an hour later, they were driving towards the Bakura household in Kyle's Honda; even though it was only about half past seven, most were ready to leave.

Ishi's house was a simple two story located in the middle of what could only be described as Suburbia. Nothing but houses for miles and you had to drive to get absolutely anywhere. A complete polar opposite of the way Ryou had been living for the past three years in Japan; where he didn't need a car… or even a bicycle like most Japanese. The metro system covered just about every area of Domino. But here in Olathe there was only one bus system, it was spread out immensely, and it was a VERY small bus that no one used. You couldn't rely on any bus system, other than school buses, and there was no such thing as a subway in Kansas (as far as Ishi knew). It was barley eight when they pulled up in Kyle's car, which was rickety as hell. Sean had fallen asleep on Matt; though Ryou REALLY wanted to, he just couldn't doze off and envied the dirty blonde greatly.

"MOM! You home!?" Ishi yelled as soon as he opened the door; the sound of scurrying claws and the thunder of two dogs running down the stairs was the only response he got. Both were pretty good sized dogs, and proceeded to jump all over Ishi and everyone else. "Tigger, knock it off!" The younger of the two dogs, a complete mutt with long grey-white hair and various different neutral colored spots all over him was the younger of the two dogs, and acted his part quiet fully. Bacon, an old bloodhound that had belonged to Ishi's late father, wagged his tail sluggishly at them. Ryou had bent down on his knees and gave the old hunting dog the attention he was wanting, while Sean preoccupied Tigger playfully. "Where'd you put your stuff Ry-Ry."

"Guest room," was the short answer, busy scratching the old dog behind the ears and getting rediscovered by the pet, who was sniffing his face and hair and clothes in strategic manners. Ishi laughed at him.

"A lot of good that does you," Ryou smiled at that, looking up at his cousin with a 'I'm not a child' look; though he knew that he would end up sleeping in Ishi's room like the other was implying. Neither really cared, but Ryou still put his stuff in a guest room.

"It's mostly so nothing will get eaten by whatever is growing in your room," Ryou shot back, his smile as close to a smirk as he could get it.

Matt interrupted with some quiet laughter. "Luckily for you Ryou, pot plants won't eat your stuff." This caused everyone else to laugh as well.

"You never know," Ryou added. "Growing in Ishi's room? They could be mutant plants now, all the fumes and chemicals floating around in there-"

"Alright, that's it you!" Ryou almost shrieked as he bolted up the stairs with Ishi right on his heels. He barely made it to one of the rooms before Ishi had tackled him to the ground. Straddling his cousin's waist, he pinned his hands down and clicked his tongue. "Now what to do with you…" Ryou actually looked scared for a moment.

He shrieked in laughter as fingers attacked his sides; another thing about Ishi, he will forget anything that's not important to him and remember exactly what he wants to, like his poor cousin being ticklish. Ryou squirmed underneath his cousin, his hands now freed he tried to stop the ones attacking him. Pushing at the elder's chest, he tried and failed to push the other off of him. "IGIVE!IGIVE!IGIVEUP!" He shrieked between laughter, squirming and bucking and laughing to the point he thought he was going to cry. "MERCY!MERCY!" Ishi finally ceased, grinning wider than Ryou was, leaning back and sitting on the other's waist. Ryou was relaxed against the carpet, breathing heavy, and glaring at Ishi. "Can you get up?"

"Why?"

"So the rest of us can get through the doorway?" Kyle suggested. Ishi had gotten Ryou to the ground, right in the middle of the doorway (what? It helps limit your captive's escape!) Ishi pouted, but got up; helping Ryou to his feet and pushed him into the room… by promptly smacking his ass. Ryou literally yipped, and whipped around to glare at him with his cheeks going straight to a tomato red color.

"What? I couldn't resist." Kyle pushed the teen into the room, though failing to keep from laughing at the raven-haired Brit.

Before the others also filed into the room, Matt sighed and shook his head in disbelief. "I don't think I would have lasted in his position," he said out of the blue. Larry turned to him.

"Who, Ryou's?"

"No. Ishi's." That earned him another smack from Sean.

--

"Why am I flying?"

"Hell if I should know."

"You're smirking, you do too know! How did- OH MY GOD YOU ASSHOLE! YOU ACTIVATED CHEAT CODES BEHIND MY BACK! YOU KNOW I CAN'T DRIVE THIS THING IN THE AIR!!!" All he received was another smirk as Ishi switched cars on the video game.

"You have way too much spare time Ishi," Kyle muttered from where he sat on the bed, slouching against the wall. They had been playing video games in Ishi's room for the past few hours, and it was really quite amusing; even if you weren't playing. Ishi's room was quite large if you didn't count the number of objects strewn EVERYWHERE! He had a large bed with a fluffy black comforter that blended with his thick black carpet. His desk was cluttered with papers and CD's and empty coke cans; and clothes were scattered throughout the room. His walls were layered with anything he could tack up there; and to top it off hundreds of post-it notes could be found on every surface.

His bed could fit about 3 people long ways and four width wise. Which gave plenty of room for Kyle to remain where he was, Ryou also residing on the bed, Matt on one edge waiting for his turn with the game controller, and Ishi laying upside down half on half off the bed… and still smirking. Also probably still activating cheat codes without Larry noticing. Larry was as close to the screen as he could get without the others yelling at him claiming they couldn't see, and Sean was sitting next to the bed, hugging Matt's leg.

Said teen looked down when that suddenly dawned on him. "Why are you hugging my leg?"

"It's warm." That was the only argument he was going to get.

"The bed's warmer."

Larry crashed his Mercedes.

Kyle groaned, "not in here, Matt." Sean was just giving him a weird look, and Ryou had his face buried in Kyle's jacket arm. "If it's too late for sexual innuendoes it's too late for you to make flat out suggestions."

"Fuck you, you know I didn't mean that."

"Someone write that down," Ishi said as he drove off of the highway and started flying through the city. Kyle grabbed a stack of post it notes. "Whoa… that is so weird to do with it upside down." He actually tilted head to get a better angle at it. "It's almost like riding in a car while your completely stoned. It's _awesome_!" Kyle snorted.

"Only you Ishi…"

"Will you hurry the fuck up? I want a turn," Matt pouted, slunking back against the wall. Kyle was the only one that noticed Sean crawl on top of him.

"Okay, seriously. Go home. Fuck each other. And go to bed. Okay?" Sean's blush rivaled Ryou's as he slid off of Matt, who glared at the brunette.

"Thanks for being so blunt."

"Someone needs to get laid," Ishi taunted, almost singing it with a smirk back on his face. Kyle glared even though the other couldn't see him.

"Unless your willing, shut up."

Silence fell over for about two seconds, and Sean yawned for the umpteenth time that night. "I guess we'll head out," Matt sighed, tugging at his boyfriend's hand and pulling him to his feet. "We're obviously not wanted here." Kyle rolled his eyes playfully.

"Love you too babe."

"I know you do," Matt smirked as he and Sean headed towards the door. "See you tomorrow?" Matt asked Ryou, nudging him from where he had spread out next to Kyle. Doe-brown eyes looked up at the two from underneath his black bangs, smiling at them.

"Yeah, see you later." Matt ruffled his hair and Sean waved at him tiredly before they disappeared out the door.

--

Larry had out right given up on playing with Ishi, Ryou was too tired, and Kyle refused to play. About nine, Kyle had given in and started playing with Ishi in a racing game. Even though no one was talking, and that TV wasn't up really loud; Ryou couldn't make himself fall asleep. He had his head in Larry's lap, letting the other mess with his hair, it soothed him and made him relax more… but he just couldn't sleep. His thoughts kept drifting back to Bakura; he hadn't thought of him much at all today. He wasn't sure if that was a good… or a bad thing. He didn't want to grieve forever, but he didn't want to forget his yami either. He'd never forgive himself if he forgot him, and all he had done for him.

His head hurt so much, pounding in time with his heat beat. He was tired of being awake, he wanted to just drift off… but something kept stopping him. And he couldn't figure out what it was.

A sigh was heard from above him; Larry had been sighing a bunch, always turning to look at something before doing so. This one had been heavier though, Ryou could feel the other's gaze on him. "Ryou, are you awake?" he asked softly, with a tone that almost sounded like he didn't want him to be awake. Nonetheless…

"Yeah, I am."

Another sigh. "I… kind of need to head home." Ryou pushed himself up and off of Larry, though it took a moment. His head felt like a ton of bricks, and his arms shook a little as he shifted over. He collapsed back onto the bed, and felt fingers once again pushing some of his bangs out of his face. "You should really get some sleep, okay? You don't look too good." He nodded, despite the pain it caused. The bed shifted as Larry stood up, searching for his boots along the floor.

"You headin' home?" Kyle's voice broke the silence again, though a little too loud; making Ryou wince from where he lay.

"Yeah, I'll see you guys tomorrow." The door opened and closed without another word.

--

Kyle tugged on his worn out shoes, not bothering to tie up the shredded laces. "I better get going, my mom's gonna have a cow if I'm not home by 10." He nudged his friend with one foot to make sure he heard him.

"'K, see ya man," he replied, not taking his eyes off of the screen but embraced him with one arm as the other hugged his neck briefly from behind.

Standing up, Kyle looked over to the other black haired teen in the room; he'd been lost in his own world for the past half-hour, gazing into nothingness while sprawled out across Ishi's bed. Kyle's train of thought would have drifted from there if it wasn't for the immense sadness that dwelled in the other's eyes. It was heartbreaking to look at.

"See you tomorrow, Ryou," his words shattering the teen's trance. It took a moment for him to register what had been said; but then he saw Kyle waiting patiently for him to register what was said, just as Matt had done earlier that day.

"Yeah, good night." He finally answered, a small smile crossed Kyle's face and he nodded to him, screwing up Ishi's hair with one hand before walking out the door. Ryou surrendered to the smallest traces of a smile as Ishi scowled and shouted "ASSHOLE!" back at Kyle before pausing his game and fixing his hair. From outside a voice that was obviously Kyle yelled "I LOVE YOU TOO ISHI!!!" fake passion in his voice and so loud that the neighbors a street over probably heard him.

Sighing, Ryou relaxed tiredly into Ishi's bed; his raven locks blending in with the soft black comforter. Closing his mocha eyes he prayed for sleep to take him, it had been so long since it had. It wasn't that he was having nightmares, but he just couldn't fall asleep. Thoughts of Bakura filling his head, as well as unanswered questions, and those thoughts of life that he thought had left him long ago. When Bakura had been around he had forgotten about those life questions that haunted him for years after his mother and sister's death; and his yami's passing had brought them back. The thought of death and what was really awaiting him burned uncomfortably inside of him, making him crave unconsciousness even more. He had long since abandoned his religion and no longer knew where to turn when it came to that thought of 'is this it'? He had seen the pharaoh pass on to the 'afterlife', but what if that was only for believers, or entrance for those of this day was not permitable. What if when you die all that is awaiting you is nothingness; and would death actually cause pain. The thought of leaving this world purposely could never cross his mind, he was too afraid of death; afraid of leaving the world that holds such a solid foundation for him.

It made him worry about his yami as well. Every night he worried him self sick, sometimes literally, that Bakura's spirit had been destroyed with the shadow game. That no matter what the life after this would give him, he'd never see his yami again. That questions he never got to ask and things he was never able to tell him would never be heard. He wanted to write letters to him, just as he did with his sister; but he didn't know what to write. He didn't want to let his yami know about the pain that has been staining his soul, the doubt that seeps into his mind during every sleepless night, and the fear that grips his heart so hard that it should have shattered long ago.

Tears soon started to sting his eyes, clinging to his eyelashes; it was inevitable to try to stop them. They also came every night, along with the soul-destroying emotions that he hadn't been able to escape. These past few weeks had seemed like a life time…

….someone was watching him. That feeling of someone's eyes boring into you, daring you to wake up. Opening his eyes, which luckily weren't blurred, to see a pair of bright green ones about three inches from his. "Yes Ishi," he almost chuckled, his voice losing a quiver it would have held.

Ishi just blinked. "Nothing, why do you always think I want something?" he whined. Ryou just gave him a look and a slight twitch of the mouth, waiting for Ishi to pull away. Though after a few minutes had passed he still hasn't moved, emerald boring into Mocha. Ryou couldn't help the small smile that broke out across his face. Ishi seemed to smirk at this action and finally leaned back and joined Ryou on his bed.

Ryou gave him a look, now figuring out what his cousin had accomplished. "I can never stay depressed around you can I?"

"That's the plan," the other said happily, turning off the TV. "Wasn't it?" Ryou understood, Ishi wanted to know… wanted to know why he had asked to come early. He knew that something happened, but didn't know what. Ryou would usually cry out his problems in tears to Ishi, who gladly took his burdens and made them disappear. But the hikari didn't want to talk about it, that would make it so painfully real he didn't think he could take it…. but that was why he came here. The tears returned, blurring his vision and the warm sorrow built up behind his eyes, threatening to spill. But Ishi always understood…

His throat seemed to swell as he chocked down the tears, letting his raven locks curtain his face. The darker color kept all light from reaching him, unlike his original snow-like color did before. It was more comforting this way; the illusion of darkness surrounding him. He held himself tightly, head bent and his lip caught between his teeth; he wanted to talk about it but didn't know where to begin. Ishi knew Bakura only to a limited extent; through phone conversations and late-night IM chats. Ishi was okay in Bakura's book, which in it's self was a hard task. A total of about five people resided in that category.

Now that Ryou thought about it that was probably how Bakura got him applied to Hot Topic from Japan . Bakura was helping him along even more than he thought, and maybe he and Ishi knew each other more than to Ryou's knowledge. How was he suppose to tell him? One tear trailed down his cheek; but Bakura had always came back… this time he won't. This time he'll be out of reach, no more items, no more magic. He's passed on… or… gone…

Black hair was pushed gently from his face and Ryou was once again looking into green eyes that… looked different. They had dulled, storm clouds darkening them, and for the first time in Ryou's memory Ishi looked… sad. A sorrowful understanding apparent in his cousin as he saw the tear trail and the blurred chocolate brown eyes. "He's gone, isn't he?" It wasn't a whisper but soft enough still, an almost fearful question. Ryou couldn't even nod yes before the tears he had been holding back streamed down his face. Sobs racked his body as Ishi pulled him close, letting his cousin cry everything out… but also concealing the tears stinging his own eyes.

He guessed he had known since Ryou had called five days ago, but he didn't want to believe it either. Ishi nuzzled his cousin's hair, holding him tighter; Ryou had started trying to get the story out between the uncontrollable sobs; Ishi listened, rubbing soothing circles into his back. Ryou started with the memory world; how Bakura had worked for months on the table top game, how he had followed along inside the ring with Ryou to the museum, had gone to Egypt , and entered the memory world. How he had planned everything to a tee; playing multiple parts in one game, how the game would have succeeded… if destiny hadn't interfered. How he had lost… and then briefly summarized the sword game between Yugi and his yami. And then told him about his fear that his yami might have been obliterated when he lost the shadow game. How he might never see him again… even in death. Then Ishi got a newer version of Ryou's fear of death, and his doubt of what was really awaiting everyone on the other side. Everything had left him completely speechless; but he didn't reveal it, knowing his cousin's entire strength still rested within him… just like it had many years ago.

Ryou's eyes were red and stung from all the tears he had cried… he didn't think he could cry anymore. Exhaustion weighed on him heavily… nearly a week of no sleep was taking its toll. Fingers slowly and comfortingly threaded through his raven locks, gently petting him and soothing him. Mocha eyes, dry and blood-shot, shut painfully; sleep slowly seeping into him. He settled completely into the bed; his head in his cousin's lap and his body heavy against the soft comforter. The two cousins stayed like that for a while; Ryou slipping further and further into a dreamless sleep that he had well deserved, and Ishi still stroking his cousin's hair… and silently pondering how he could help the British teen. That had always been his job; to make things better-

Ryou was lost in a near unconsciousness, numb to the world but vaguely aware of it. He could tell when his cousin moved, careful not to disturb him, and lay behind him on the bed… and then his mind was aware of everything.

The feeling of someone just… being there, almost foreign to him now, as he had gone through a complete withdraw of some sort; it was the most reassuring thing he had received. His cousin once again pulled him close and nuzzled his neck affectionately; it was no secret that Ishi adored him, and that Ryou had placed his total trust in his cousin in return. But for Ryou, the feeling- no, just _knowing_… that someone else understood, that now somewhat knew his pain, and was… more than willing to help him through it… made him feel not so alone anymore.

Ishi once again had his arms around his cousin's waist, holding him close to his chest. Feeling him still shaking, but his breathing start to even out until finally… it was steady and slow. Asleep at last; all afternoon he had worried that the now raven-haired teen was going to pass out in the middle of the mall. Hopefully he would be able to get the sleep he deserved. Deciding to follow suite, Ishi let out one last yawn before curling up to his younger cousin; he'd figure out what to do in the morning, he had discovered a bigger problem while listening to the other earlier… than the one that Bakura had talked about to him before…

It takes time to heal a broken heart… and three months wasn't going to be enough…

**_TBC…

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19 pages, I told you it would be long.

I guess that wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. But I still don't like the ending. Maybe you do:shrugs: Whatever. Hopefully the next chapter won't take as long.

Flames are used to roast marshmallows. But if you flame Ishi I will hunt down your ass! He's fricken' awesome so no bashing him! And no bashing my friends.

But **please _REVIEW!!!!__

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_- Melain_


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